


Our God Is Not A Smiling God

by The_General_Gist



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Give me a break, Its been months since I listened to the Strexcorp arc, Night Vale AU, Spoilers, Typical Night Vale Weirdness, Welcome to Night Vale News Program Format, all hail the glow cloud
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:01:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22773037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_General_Gist/pseuds/The_General_Gist
Summary: Or; if Junko Enoshima was born in Night Vale.
Kudos: 13





	Our God Is Not A Smiling God

Pessimism is its own reward. Optimism is a crime. Welcome, to Night Vale.

The entire town is celebrating the defeat of Strexcorp! The City Council has finally left their hiding spot, the Antique Shop is offering lower prices, and the people of the tiny underground city are preparing a propaganda parade against us! Even the Glow Cloud, all hail the immortal Glow Cloud, has joined in on the fun! The entire PTA repeatedly chanted, "Huntokar will return! Huntokar is the Destroyer!" Whoever this Huntokar is, they're more than welcome to celebrate with us!

Breaking News; the City Council has left for another vacation. They said they were going somewhere, anywhere really, that isn't Night Vale.

A high school girl by the name of Junko Enoshima has proposed to the PTA that manslaughter be added as an elective. She went on to suggest the idea of something called a 'Killing Game.' The Glow Cloud listened intently. More on this, as it develops.

And now, traffic; fire blotting out the sky, screams everywhere as pink blood rains from above. No one likes driving in the rain. Still, it's a free car wash, so who can complain?

We at the station sent Intern Makoto to interview the student brave enough to pitch an idea to the Glow Cloud, all hail. When asked to elaborate on her reasons for such a life threatening activity. Ms.Enoshima said that the emotion we all desire most, that being joy, is often expressed by smiling. Smiling, she continued, is tribute to the Smiling God of Desert Bluffs, the same Smiling God that nearly destroyed our beloved town. Junko reasoned that if joy and hope are tribute to the Smiling God, then Despair is a repellent. "Despair is what gives me life," Junko said excitedly. "And we most certainly don't want the Smiling God to escape the Desert Otherworld via our hopes and dreams, now do we?"

When Intern Naegi attempted to produce a counter argument to her claims, Junko stabbed him roughly seventy-three times. He had only just made it back to station to hand me his notes before passing out from the blood loss. To the family of Intern Makoto, he was an intern that existed. He will be missed.

It was at this moment the Glow Cloud started to drop dead animals, a sign of approval for Ms.Enoshima's pitch. All the animals were bears, which Junko beamed at, without smiling. The rest of the PTA didn't object, for they were too terrified of the Glow Cloud, all hail the almighty Glow Cloud that rules over all of us tiny mortals, to do so. 

And so Night Vale High School's first annual Killing Game, organized by Junko Enoshima, has begun, but first, let's go to the weather.

\- Hated by Life Itself -

I'm so, so sorry, listeners! Just after going to the weather, all my equipment cut out! It's been three weeks since the Killing Game started! Station Management was furious that we couldn't cover it!

But yeah, three weeks has passed and the Killing Game has officially ended. It didn't go perfectly, as about four of the sixteen selected students survived, but Junko Enoshima shrugged and said we'll probably get the next batch all despairing and killed next year. She went on to say that the project's purpose, to spread despair across all of Night Vale so that no more doors to the Desert Otherworld would open, was a success. So that's good.

Stay tuned for the sound of crying families, tears shed both in grief of their dead children, and victory over the Smiling God. Goodnight, Night Vale, goodnight.


End file.
